How long can you go without….you know….Tweeting
21 Jan
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Tweet This Seinfeld
If Seinfeld was on the air today they would most likely write an episode in which the characters would bet each other on how long they can go without tweeting. Of course this would lead to hilarious dialogue and scenarios.
How long can you go without using Twitter? Are you an addict?
The five classes of Twitterland
As far as I can tell – Tweeters fall into one of five classes…
1) “I tweet therefore I am”
The issue: These folks identify so closely with their Twitter identity that they write only their @name on their name tags at conferences.
Key danger: You actually believe someone doesn’t exist if they don’t have a Twitter account.
2) “I am a compulsive tweeter”
The issue: These are the folks who just can’t stop Tweeting. Don’t have wifi or cell service on that long airline flight? Oh no – how are you going to tweet what you had to drink with your meal? Write 140 characters on the back of an airline napkin and then type it into Twitter when you land of course.
Key danger: Like any addiction – you tell yourself you don’t have a problem and this thing is manageable.
3) “I don’t have a #%@& clue what I’m doing on here. Someone said I should be using this so here I am.”
The issue: These people don’t know what they are doing and so begin to post without really understanding the toolset. They begin to post random complaints or thoughts that they think sound candid – but in reality – they sound very contrived.
Key danger: You look like a dork who doesn’t have a clue.
4) “I will post links to all my amazing and awesome offers and business opportunities and you will love them so much that you will visit my site and make me millions. Hehehehe.”
The issue: No one cares about you or your millionaire maker website. At least not until you engage us as humans and not masses of people who can make you rich.
Key danger: You give yourself false hope. You are building a reputation as “that guy.” What a sorry sap you are.
5) I am very manipulative with my tweeting by name dropping and hoping to be apart of the “in” crowd at conferences and events.
The issue: You are in need of friends and an ego boost. Instead of just developing relationships with people you come in contact with – you go after the big fish and expect them to reply to your @ messages every time. When they don’t – you are enraged.
Key danger: You are setting yourself up for disappointment.
My Advice For Serious Twitter Users
Get off Twitter.
Seriously.
What good is it? What has it done for you? How are you benefiting?
Actually – the best question to ask is…
How is anyone else benefiting from you on Twitter?
They probably aren’t – so just stop using this stupid and pointless service.
If you still are convinced that you need to be using this tool (like I am) then here are a few suggestions.
Be yourself. Be helpful. Be encouraging. Be interesting. A lot more can be gained by focusing on other people and their hopes, dreams, successes, and failures. It is rewarding and fun to help others succeed.
What are your thoughts on Twitter? Do you agree disagree?
Also check out my post over at Folk Media for thoughts on Twitter For Business.
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This site, Joel-Mark-Witt.com, is where I ask the questions while standing at the intersection of social media, podcasting, online video, marketing, PR, storytelling, life and leadership…. and what the heck this all means for my business and yours. If you like what you see – please subscribe to it for free. To join the discussion or to comment in real time follow me on Twitter.
* Photo by dailyclerks
